Artsy Friday - Sage's world

Sage has been drawing variations of this scene lately. Here's another:

They all have the same elements - a sun, birds, grass, trees, a boy (Sage) with a square frame around him, a line hanging down from the square, and a box off to the left side with circles in it.

It's his "favorite place" - our backyard. The square to the left is our tiny side porch that can barely hold the three chairs (two for us, one little one for him) and a flowerpot we have on it. The frame around the boy is a rusty (albeit sturdy) old clothesline and the line hanging down is his swing. It's a sorry excuse for a swing set, but he loves it.
Poor kid. When he was a baby and we were still living in West Virginia he had all this (for about 1/5 the price)

and he doesn't even remember it. They don't make land like that around these parts. Luckily, Sage doesn't feel like he's missing anything. He loves his swing and the rusty old clothesline it hangs from. It's his "favorite place."

Thrift Thursday - Mug Love

No, I didn't get those all this week, I've collected these within the last two years. Actually, this week I've been purging things instead of collecting them. Today I dropped off a bunch of stuff at the American Way in Burbank. I'm trying to find some Feng Shui for this house and I think it's hiding in the clutter.

Luckily, mugs don't take up much room. There's something about a brightly painted vintage mug that makes me happy. Do you know how many ugly mugs there are out there? Plenty. Thrift stores have shelves and shelves of them and everyone tries to give them away at yard sales. Only once in a blue moon does a pretty vintage painted one slip into the mix and I can spot them a mile away. It's just nice to start your day with a cup of coffee in a mug you love.

See more drool-worthy mugs here.

wwW.ednesday - Flickr

It took me a while to figure it out at first, but now I'm addicted to Flickr. Photo sharing - what a concept! It's like candy for the eyes. It's like ebay without all the pesky bidding. Pictures are posted on Flickr merely to be appreciated. People are sharing their perspectives and in turn, others post comments on how the image moved them - "This reminds me of. . ." , or how they relate to it - "I have that same mug!", or how they simply appreciate it - "Great job!" I've found it to be a very positive community and a nice place to visit when I just want to look at pretty things.

Like Pyrex, Vintage Fisher-Price Toys, Thrift store finds, handmade handbags, plush creatures, art studios, craft shows, the corners of people's homes, babies, gardens, etc. etc.

If you look at all the groups a person has joined you can get a good sense of what they appreciate. What are you into?

Bugs? Boogers? Hot air balloons? Bubble gum?

Whatever it is, I bet there's a Flickr group for it. If not, then start your own! Someone out there will want to see your pictures.

To Do Tuesday

Made by Monday - Bags!

I was on a bag-making kick this weekend. It started with this:


I got the needlepoint piece on Friday and immediately brought it home and started making a purse around it. That inspired me to get out a bunch of other needlepoint pieces I'd been holding on to and finally turn those into bags as well. Next came this:


then this:


I don't know why I have such an affinity for other people's needlepoint. It makes me sad to see it in thrift stores. Someone spent hours and hours meticulously stitching these things, then somewhere along the line decided they didn't want them anymore. They look so forlorn in their frames, if they even have frames at all. I feel it's my duty to rescue them and give them a proper showcase in a whole new form. Plus, I like how they look hanging around my studio.

One more bag before I go. I made this today from a vintage cloth napkin:

I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

I'm almost 33, you'd think I have it figured out by now, but I've never really had the time to settle into a career. I keep taking breaks to do things like have a baby and move across country and have another baby and sew. When someone asks me what I do for a living I never really know how to answer. Um, I make monsters and pillows? The term "stay at home mom" bugs me because it's not who I am. I mean, I am, but I also do other things, even if it's just within the confines of my house.

I wonder if I'll always have kokoleo. I don't think there will ever be time when I don't want to sew, but I wonder if there will come a time when I stop it as a business. I've got so much inventory it's ridiculous - monsters, kid clothes, pillows, stuff made with chopped up ties, humongous purses. Why do I make all this stuff? Are people even going to want these weird things? Maybe I should just get a real job and sew for myself. I could finally get around to making those curtains for the computer room and reupholstering our dining room chairs.

The problem is, I don't really know what it is I want to do. Teach again? I could. I love it, really. I did it for 6 years and I've heard from kids and principals that I'm pretty good at it. Plus, the schedule is great when you have kids. Maybe I could get into a nice private school in the area and Sage and McKenna could get their education for free. That would be worth it.

But, I need to get my California credential to teach legit and I just don't feel like jumping through those hoops right now.

Maybe I could get an editing job at Yahoo? I saw an ad on Craigslist for it. I pass the giant Yahoo complex every day on my way to take Sage to kindergarten. I'd be close to home and it might be fun to dress up and look respectable. I did that kind of work at the Martinsburg Journal before Sage was born. I like reading and fixing stuff and my HTML skills are decent.

But, I think I'd go nuts in a cubical, and I'd constantly be wondering what my kids were up to.

My dream job is to work on a show like Sesame Street or Robot Chicken just making random props and puppets and costumes. This is definitely the town to do it in.

But then there's the problem of "breaking in to the industry" which I'd need to tackle. Plus, I hear the hours can be crazy which isn't really conducive to family time. We need to have at least one parent around enough to keep our kids out of trouble.

When I was a kid I used to say that I wanted to grow up and write children's books. I could do that. I should do that. But I never get around to it. I should put that on my To Do list.

Let's see, I used to be a white water raft guide in West Virginia. Maybe I could do that again? Um, no. The L.A. river is not that kind of river. Nix that idea.

Open my own shop? That might be cool. I would have a place to house all my inventory, maybe even sell some stuff, and support other handmade artisans as well. Everyone would love me for giving them a venue and I would finally feel like I belonged in L.A.. I'd be like the Valley version of Mayra from Monkeyhouse Toys. I love her. I kind of learned the ropes during my years at the Dragonfly in Shepherdstown and I would love to decorate a space of my own.

But, I also saw how hard it was to have a shop and have to be there every day. I don't think I could handle the responsibility right now with all the bills and liablity and also, the kids.

Man, kids mess everything up, don't they? I'm kidding! The truth is I love how having them has forced me to reinvent myself. I wouldn't have kokoleo if it weren't for Sage. I wonder what McKenna will inspire me to do.

There's really no need for me to be antsy. I keep telling myself that this is all I need to be doing right now - nursing, sitting, staring at my daughter, picking up my son from kindergarten, vacuuming up dog hair, going for walks, hanging around playgrounds, picking up Tinker Toys. I'm lucky to have this time. All I really need to do is cherish this moment. I'll have plenty of time to do other stuff, whatever it is, and everything will happen for a reason.

Self Portrait Saturday

I cut myself some bangs. . .


. . . and I think I hate them. Oops!

Artsy Friday - Circus Liquor

Just one of the exciting attractions in our neighborhood. . .


Circus Liquor! Sage used to think this was some sort of funland for kids and wondered why we never took him there.


This clown taught him how to read the word LIQUOR and WINE, which Sage now shouts whenever we pass it. He also knows how to read XXX, Tattoo, Smoke Shop, 99 cents Only, and GIRLS! GIRLS! GIRLS! Yes, North Hollywood has it all.

Thrift Thursday

Last Saturday I attended two estate sales close by. Both were in homes whose heyday was the 60s and 70s - lots of mustard yellows, olive greens, wacky linoleum, and general Brady Bunch style interior design. Here's my fabric haul for the day:

and this tablecloth with 5 matching napkins. I love the chicken wire print.

Today I took McKenna to a rummage sale at a convent nearby. She was alert in her stroller the whole time, just looking around and cooing. I think she's going to be a great bargain hunting companion. I even found her a vintage, unopened package of Goody barrettes! I got myself some big buttons and a cool needlepoint piece which I promptly came home and started turning into a purse - hopefully I'll have it made by Monday. We'll see!

Ballad of Sinister

Have I mentioned that I'm married to an amazing artist? I am. I like to think I'm his muse but really I'm just riding his coattails. I fell in love with one of his paintings before I fell in love with him. I asked my friend John, "Who did this painting? I love it!" and he said "That guy." and pointed to Erik on the stage of the (first) epicenter shouting poetry into the microphone.

Fast forward 12 years and one of those poems has taken on a life of it's own. In that time, Erik did other things like go to graduate school, get married (to me!), have a couple jobs and a couple kids, but steadily, he's also been working on this major project - making an animated short film. It's called Ballad of Sinister and it's a beautifully tragic story of a sad soul who had the unfortunate luck of being born a freak.

I can't tell you how many times I've heard the poem (it's about 15 minutes long) because snippets of it are constantly being shouted from his computer. Our walls in the computer room are covered in concept art - all sorts of freaks, goblins, a medieval village, and a very strange land. Working on this movie has been his hobby and it's exciting to see that after all these years, it's really starting to come together. Other people are now helping out - actors lending their voices, a composer writing the score, and animators working on the characters. You know you have something good going on when other people are offering to help.

But I can't say too much. It's still a TOP SECRET project. Hopefully though, if things keep coming together, you'll hear about it in a couple years. Remember where you heard it first.

Tuesday's To Do List

Made by Monday

My friend Renee is going to be in the audience for The Price Is Right tomorrow and she asked me to make her a shirt. Here she is practicing her reaction for when they tell her to "Come on Down!"


I hope she gets to play Plinko and when she spins the wheel it lands on the dollar and she goes all the way to the Showcase Showdown and wins. I fantasize that Drew Carrey will ask her where she got her cool shirt and she'll plug kokoleo on national t.v.

I've been a letter making machine lately. Here are some other things I made this week:

for Heidi:


for catklein:
for Jill:

and a few I made in the last couple weeks:

for Naomi:

for Marie:
for Heather:
For Heidi:

Please note: I will be taking a break from making personalized pieces during November and December. If you would like one in time for Christmas, please order before October 31st. Thanks!

Sunday Confessional

On Sundays I'll confess my secrets. Nothing too scandalous, just the things that I would otherwise omit from my blog. Things like: my house is a mess, I can't cook, I've become frumpy, my skin's broken out, I murder houseplants, I'm having an affair with the mailman - stuff like that.

So today I'll show you the state of my studio. It's a mess.

I've got this room stuffed to the gills with kokoleo merchandise, projects-in-progress, things to be repaired, and fabric and notions spilling from every corner. My desk overfloweth. . .


I keep the fabric I use for personalized pieces in a big bin beside my sewing table. For small scraps, they take up a surprising amount of space. Notice also the tangle of ties creeping out from under the table. They like to wrap themselves around my ankles when I'm desperately searching for a foot pedal.

My ironing board quickly gets piled with projects that need immediate attention. So I ignore them and just iron on a towel on the floor. Notice the bag of hangers below it. The only thing worse than a bag of hangers is a bag of angry cats.


My dresser and closet. . .


It may look like chaos but I know exactly where everything is. Except my scissors. They always disappear on me. They run off with my seam rippers and hide in the most ridiculous places. It's not until I go out and buy new ones that they show themselves.

Someday I'm going to come home from a yard sale excursion with the coolest vintage fabric ever! but when I go into my sewing room to find a place for it, the room will suddenly EXPLODE and spew fabric scraps and ric-rac all over the neighborhood. The room cannot hold another little notion.

So guess what? I'm getting a new studio! We signed the paperwork and handed over a check this afternoon. Kokoleo will soon take up residence in the area formerly known as our patio and McKenna will finally get her own room. Sweet!

Self Portrait Saturday

That's me with my pinkie up taking the picture. We went to Lombardi Ranch in Saugus, California this afternoon to pick out our pumpkins. Sage liked this one:

Looking for the perfect pumpkin. . .

McKenna's first Fall. . .

Artsy Friday

Friday's theme is Artsy Friday where I'll show random art from around our house, graffiti in the neighborhood, drawings by Sage, or stuff from galleries and museums around L.A.

I thought I'd start with this:


The first piece of art I ever bought. It was the summer of 1995 and I had just moved into a house with three of my friends, Kendra, Fred and Eric (but not my Erik), in Shepherdstown, West Virginia. I was working as a waitress at The Bistro during the week and at The Dragonfly (a vintage clothing store) on the weekends. This piece of art caught my eye when it was in the window at Shepherdstown Paint and Art.

Why does that house seem so familiar? Who was that expressionless woman staring out the window? Why are there stars in a sunny sky? Why is the house all blurry? Whatever happened to that lady?

But I walked on, and for weeks when I passed the window I couldn't help but stop and stare at it.

How old was that lady when she died? Where is that house? I swear I've been there. Why the gold stars? Gold stars remind me of elementary school and how I never got enough of them. Who is this R. Reus who signed this picture? What does the R. stand for?

It started to bother me really. I found it both haunting and beautiful. Finally, I walked into the shop and bought it for $35, which was a lot of money for me at the time but seems like a steal now. It's been by my bed in every one of the 8 houses I've lived in ever since. That strange lady in he window watches over me while I sleep.

I've never been able to answer any of the questions I first had about it. If anything, I've just come up with more questions. But now, the best thing this picture makes me think of is a 20 year old me living in Shepherdstown, West Virginia, working at The Bistro and The Dragonfly, living on Main Street with Kendra and Fred and Eric, and one day, in the summer of 1995, buying myself a work of art.

Thrift Thursday

Thrift Thursday was actually started by Carrie Sommer of Sommer Designs. On her blog she often posts photos and stories of her flea market finds and thrift store scores. She even started a Flickr group called Thrift Thursday so others could share their treasures as well. Here's my latest entry to the photo pool:

Check out the knobs on that thing! I swear it just dropped from the Heavens and landed right in front of me. And it was free!

Last Friday Sage and McKenna and I went to our friends Lauren and Ava's house in Silverlake for a playdate. When I couldn't find a parking space in front of their apartment building, I had to drive around the block to try again. In the process of doing this, I spotted this dresser just hanging out on the sidewalk with some other odd junk. I slowed down a bit but kept driving. I told myself, if it was still there after our playdate, then it was meant to be mine.

Fast forward two hours. I drove down the same street on our way home and the dresser was still there waiting for me. I pulled up beside it and got out to give it a closer look. The drawers slid like buttah (wonky drawers are a deal-breaker) and the side cabinet opened to reveal a fully functioning pull-out clothing rack. Sweet! Other plusses included the fact that it was on wheels and that it was made of real wood, not that pressed fiberboard crap. The minuses were minor - it was a little dusty, there was an odd assortment of broken light switches in one drawer, and there were random black smudges here and there. I quickly did a pro/con analysis in my head and decided the pros won out. The only problem then was how to get it in my car.

That's when the Heavens dropped down my Fairy Grandfather. As I was standing there looking back and forth between the dresser and the trunk of my station wagon, an older man who was standing in his garage across the street asked me if I needed help. He walked over and pulled a tape measure out of his pocket (how many people carry a tape measure in their pocket?) and measured both the dresser and my trunk. We determined that it would fit, but it would have to stick out a few inches. He helped me hoist it in and even crawled under my car to hook up a bungee cord (that I luckily had in the trunk) and secure the trunk door tight against the dresser. I thanked him profusely and was on my way.

Next problem - getting home. Silverlake is a good 10 miles from North Hollywood, with the Hollywood Hills between them. Oh, and it was rush hour. There was no way I was going to get on the freeway. Instead, I drove 25 mph with my hazards on through Griffith Park. Amazingly, there was no one behind me the entire time. The ride through Burbank was equally as easy. It took me twice as long as it usually does to get home, but all my precious cargo arrived safely.

Okay, so apparently I’m a scavenger. But seriously, when the Heavens drop the perfect dresser in your path and a Fairy Grandfather to help you load it in your car, you know it was meant to be.

World Wide Wednesday

Wednesday's theme is World Wide Wednesday, where I'll talk about whatever is currently catching my attention on the world wide web.

Recently, while checking out my friend Adrien's blog Amblus, I ran across a link to her friend Noah's blog Skull-A-Day. Noah has vowed to create (or find) a new skull image every day for an entire year and post them on his blog. Sometimes he goes to great lengths to create work of skull art,


and sometimes it just happens before him like in the left over oil and vinegar residue from his dinner.

You can even join him by tagging your own skully photos "skulladay" and posting them on Flickr. Everyone! Bring out your dead! For a symbol typically reserved to arouse fear, denote death, or inspire evil, it's impressive to see skulls presented in surprisingly beautiful ways.

I wonder why so many people are drawn to skulls right now? Sage sure is. Growing up, I remember them being reserved for pirate flags and Hell's Angels' jackets and cartoon poison bottles. For the last few years they've been popping up everywhere - on clothes, shoes, jewelry, toys, graffiti, etc. Why are so many of us suddenly wild about skulls? They're all over the independent designer scene too - I've seen them at craft shows on purses and aprons and baby clothes. Adrien, who I mentioned above, sells these cool skull earrings (a pair of which I'm lucky enough to own). And my skully shouldered tee-shirts have been some of my best sellers for both kids and grownups.

I have a theory. I don't think it's just a coincidence that the skull trend has emerged since the threat of terrorism and the war in Iraq have become aspects of our modern lives. I don't think it's a conscious decision: I fear death so I will make the symbol of it familiar, cute even, and display it proudly. But I think there's a link. Every day we're bombarded with news about bombings and body counts and yet we go on as if everything is fine. Still, the threat and horror of death looms, if not in our own cushy surroundings, then out there, happening to other people. It's nothing new, I suppose. We all die someday and bad things have been happening to good people since the dawn of time, but in the last few years it seems the issue has been forced upon us. PEOPLE ARE DYING. What are we going to do about it?


Um, I don't know how to end this post now. I have no answers. I promise tomorrow's post won't be such a downer. For now, go check out Skull-A-Day. That should cheer you up.

Tuesday's To Do List

I love writing myself "To Do" lists. Even better, I love crossing things off as I accomplish them. On Tuesdays, I'm going to post my "To Do" list for the week. Hopefully by making the mundane tasks of my every day life public, I'll be more apt to accomplish them in a timely manner. We'll see.

Tuesday, October 2:

1. Get plumber out here STAT to replace leaking water heater that flooded our computer room. Also get him to fix leaking faucet, wobbly toilet and noisy washing machine. Cough up $600+ and weep.


2. Try to find carpet specialists for advice on putting back the carpet we ripped up when the computer room flooded. Also research toxic mold.

3. Call to get estimates on fixing up the back porch.

4. Finish writing Thank Yous.

5. Get bags for the vacuum cleaner. Finish vacuuming.

6. Work on commissions: "Madeline's Room" banner, Cooper banner, Raleigh pillow, Laura pillow, 2 shirts for Heidi, and a Monsterlina for Avenelle

7. Straighten up the sewing room.

8. Buy milk, eggs, and supplies to donate to Sage's classroom.

9. Make appointment to get hair cut. Then color hair blonde or red.

10. Call Patty at ZenPup to see about dogsitting for Kali. (Check out Kali and (sniff) Leo in her photo gallery!)

11. Take Kali for a walk.

12. Meet with John to design shark costume.

13. Call mom.

Made by Monday returns!

It's the first day of a new month and I have a plan. I'm going to try to post every day in October. Last month I only had 4 measly posts. Visiting a blog and finding a stale old post is like turning to a channel to watch your favorite t.v. show only to find that it's a rerun. BOR-ING. Abandoned blogs are the worst. Don't leave us hanging people! One day two years ago you were telling us what you had for dinner and then you were gone. What happened next? Come back and continue the story! I was reading that!

Heck, I'll probably abandon this blog someday as well. Who knows, maybe blogging will go out of style. How long can we keep it up? Are those of us who are writing now going to continue to blog into our elderly years, or will we all eventually cut the story short and stop writing for public consumption? It'll be interesting to see who keeps it up and who gives up. It is kinda hard sometimes to put ones life into words. It's even harder to do it authentically.

For now, I'm up for the challenge of posting every day. To keep me interested, I'm going to give myself assignments for each day of the week. It's something I've been thinking about for a while, and tried to do with my Made by Mondays before I slacked off (oh yeah, and had a baby). From now on, or at least through October, each day will have a theme which I will reveal throughout this week (I'm still figuring out what those themes will be.) Then, every week I'll return to those same themes in a new way. This probably makes no sense right now, but stick with me and you'll see what I mean.

So, Monday's theme is "Made by Monday" and um, I didn't make anything. But I made a plan! And that's something.

Wild child

My thoughts have been preoccupied with Sage lately. Namely, how he's doing in kindergarten. Every day I drop him off I pray that he will be good but every day when I pick him up I hear that he was "hyper," or "wild" or "all over the place." Yep, I think, that's Sage. That's pretty much how he's always been.

He stopped taking naps when he was about 12 months old. For a while I tried to institute "quiet time" where he would stay in his room and "rest." Sage does not rest. Instead he would throw all his stuffed animals on the floor and "swim" in them. Sometimes he would read books. By "read" I mean he would take every single book off the bookshelf, study the pictures for a while, dissect the pop-up books, then use them as "skates" and go "book skating" across the carpet. Sometimes he would stack them and use them as steps and climb the furniture.

He's five now and and he's still as hyper as ever. Every morning he wakes up around 7:00 and comes in our room. If I'm lucky, he'll crawl in bed beside me and snuggle for a minute or two, which is nice, until I get accidentally kneed in the gut or elbowed in the boob. Usually though he's yelling, "Breakfast! I want breakfast please! I said PLEASE! Oatmeal. I want oatmeal. No. Waffles. I want waffles. How 'bout oatmeal and waffles? Does that sound good? Mom, wake up! I want breakfast!"

And for the rest of the day the kid does not shut up. If he's watching a cartoon he will narrate it for you. If we're at the store he will comment on every. single. item. that catches his eye. Loudly, mind you. If he's playing with toys he will have an entire dialog going among his characters, all in their own goofy voices acting out some wild scenario where eventually everyone "gets dead." If left to his own devices with no toys or t.v., he'll invent some elaborate story where he's a pirate or a secret agent or a superhero, usually recruiting Kali to be his sidekick and making me and Erik the bad guys.

The kid barrels through life nonstop. He goes to bed at 8:30, yet comes out of his room 5 or 6 times during the night with a new excuse every time. "I'm thirsty" or "I have to pee" or "I want to go to Disneyland" or "I lost my sticker that I got in school because it fell in the dirt and I tried to wash it off but it got all soggy so I put it in my pocket but now I think it's gooonnne!". . . cue dramatic tears.

Yeah, he's a handful, but he's also pretty hilarious sometimes. And he can be incredibly sweet too. Some would say his behavior is typical for a 5 year old boy. Some would say he's the extreme. On the second day of kindergarten his teacher told me she thought he was eating too much sugar because he was acting "wild" in the afternoons (I checked, he hadn't eaten anything sugary at all). Since then, every day when I go to pick him up I pray to hear that he was "good." But every day I hear stuff like "he won't sit on the carpet during story time" or "he squirms all over his seat during table time" or "he was climbing a pole during snack time" or scenarios like this:

They have a program called PeaceBuilders where they all pledge to care for one another and they sing a song. Sage HATES the song. He says it's "creepy" and it makes him "feel weird." When they sing it he covers his ears and shakes his head violently and yells, "I don't want to be a PeaceBuilder!" What the hell? The teachers must think his parents are war mongering Republicans or something.

Suddenly, I'm the mom of that kid. I was a teacher for 6 years and it's strange for me to be on this side of the parent/teacher dynamic. I know that type of kid. The one that requires more energy and attention than all the others. The one the teachers roll their eyes over in the teachers lounge. The one the parents whisper about. The one the kids love to laugh at but then easily turn against and tattle on. If this is what it's like his first month of kindergarten, what will it be like when he's a teenager?

I'd be worried if not for the fact that he's actually pretty good at home. I'd chalk it up to some weird response to having a new sibling in the house, but he's so loving toward McKenna I just don't see it. Plus, she's so easy-going that very little attention has been diverted from him. I thought maybe it was his low blood sugar acting up so I tweaked his diet and removed anything artificial or processed. Nothing. He's still wild after carrots and hardboiled eggs.

I guess I'm just looking for anything other than my parenting as the cause for his inability to hack it in the real world. Did I pay too much attention to him, or not enough? Did I buy him too many treats? Let him stay up past nine too many times? Do I encourage his creativity too much? Not enough?

Maybe it's hereditary. My mom tells me she spent a few afternoons in the principal's office because of my brother. Erik says his elementary years were similar - teachers had him pegged as a "bad" kid and the label followed him into subsequent classrooms. And just like Sage, he could never see what he was doing that was so wrong.

Sage is most definitely not a bad kid. Even his teacher would say that he's not malicious in his behavior, just hyper. If you ask him, he'll tell you that he loves kindergarten. At Back to School night the kids ran up to him and said hi, so I don't think he's annoying them too much. I guess I'll see. I've been asked to observe him in class on Monday, it's that bad. Sage, of course, is very excited about this. Wonderful.